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Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Daily Tip: Happy #smday, but don't let social media ruin your life!

The successful person is the average person, focused. ~Anonymous
Many folks and not just those of us with ADD/ADHD are prone to having our bums glued to the chairs in front of our PC's or laptops for hours on end socializing with others we may or may not be friends with.

I found a couple of interesting articles online regarding social media, Facebook and relationships.
    You can check these out and see what you think.

Divorce Lawyers: Facebook Tops in Online Evidence

Facebook doesn't cause divorce — spouses do!
It's fun to blame a social network for our ills, but really it's just a tool

The Simpsons showed Bart pretending to be a lonely middle-aged housewife flirting with a loser online. Lonely people may be gullible, children are also at risk. 
Everyone should protect their identity, and not reveal too much that might harm them. 
Don't be gullible, and be careful about doing business online, as well as dating online.
Thomas Jefferson is quoted as saying, "Honesty is the first chapter in the book of wisdom." 
With so many bloggers and tweeters pretending to be everyone from Britney Spears, to Ashton Kutcher, be wary online and stay safe.
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Daily Tip: No Kidding! The Comeback Kid is always a winner! or There would be no AFTER, if there were no Before

The Comeback Kid is always a winner! or There would be no AFTER, if there were no Before!

I think I am a fan of "Fractured Fairy Tales," by looking at the headings of my blog postings lately!  Remember FFT on the Rocky and Bullwinkle Show?
I loved watching Fractured Fairy Tales!
Now, what is my point about the Comeback Kid?
Well, with ADD/ADHD the biggest room in the world we have, is the ROOM FOR IMPROVEMENT!
There are so many tasks we fall behind on, forget to do, or basically overlook due to poor memories, poor motivation and overall poor self-control!
So, what one thing is it you think you want to focus on doing this week?
My one thing is to really clean the kitchen!
And next week it is the dining room.
I was halfway through giving the kitchen a good clean up, and on the way to organizing it, when I got distracted by a hundred other things in life, and now I need to get back on track.
Really, there are SO MANY THINGS I HAVE TO DO! 
It is literally mind-boggling!
But, I must start in one corner and that corner is the kitchen.
So, I have given myself until Friday to do it.
Have a great one!
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Monday, June 28, 2010

Daily Tip: Do not regret growing older, or every day above ground is a good one!

Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many. ~Author Unknown

Glad to have survived coming home in a very bad storm.
Twisters were spotted in the area we were driving through on Saturday night, and I was terrified, but elated when we finally arrived home!
You can hear the rain, and see the lightening and experience a little of what I went through.

Love life, and no matter how you may feel about time, aging, or problems, being alive beats the alternative, and you can really appreciate so much of life if you keep this in mind.

Remember not to sweat the big or small stuff.  Live life and celebrate every breath you take.
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Sunday, June 27, 2010

Daily Tip: Save steps, save time, clean up after yourself!

Summertime means more time to play outdoors, so why be stuck inside playing catch-up?  Clean up as you go, by no means an easy task, but try already! and save those indoor distractions 'til after the sun goes down!
Have a wonderful week!
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Daily Tip: If you have to do something you have to do, then just do it and don't make everyone else suffer.

There are trials and tribulations in everyone's life.  When the weather gets bad we radio DJ's have to leave the comfort of our little nests and go into the station and spend a few more of our precious free hours back at it, on-air, informing and updating the world about what is happening with the weather.
I used to balk at it, and now I just do it.  I know how important it is for people to be safe in violent and severe weather.
So, if you have a job to do.  Do it.  Get it done with and be glad of it.
Life can be hard, but everyone's gotta do stuff they don't want to do, but (they know they) have to do sometimes, or be out on their ear!  It is better to do it cheerfully and make others feel ok, instead of bragging and bringing everyone down with a bad attitude!
Peace, and carrots,  ;-)

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Friday, June 25, 2010

Daily Tip: Things always revert back to bad if you don't keep up your end

Sad to say after 2 weeks of clean kitchen bliss, the kitchen is now a pigsty once again!
I have been really busy lately with work - my husband too.
Now I have my work cut out for me on a Friday night.
Clean the kitchen sink.
Here is a parody cynically-styled song I created about just that.  Enjoy it you with the clean sinks and polished countertops, and those like me, who have to wade through messes!!!

I wound up doing the dishes tonight..yay!  (well, most of them!)

Have a wonderful weekend!
Amy Zents
Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Daily tip: It's easier to be sold, than to sell, but, sell you must to stay in business!

"Would I buy me if I were you?"

I just did a concert in German park.  My band is Molly and Sonny Boy.  My husband and moi.

See video:

Ok.  Why could I NOT promote myself on the radio with gusto?
I should be able to, because I am a radio personality!
Well, my boss, a Marconi-award nominated Radio Jock, who has his own Morning Show, and I got something funny out of it for all the staff to hear.
I said, "Brian, I can't plug myself on the air!" and he said, "Why not?"
I said, "I want YOU to plug me!"  Well, they all got a chuckle out of that one!
No, seriously, everyone is selling.  It may take more than a little confidence for those of us with ADHD/ADD to sell ourselves, but we need to be schmoozers and ply our trades to world with finesse.
It is hard, but we have to sell ourselves.  Our product must be packaged nicely, and not stink or be dirty.
Our personality must shine with beauty and politeness, being kind with every word, look and gesture.
The best rule of thumb?
Ask yourself:
Do I like what I see in the mirror?
Would I want to "buy" me?
If your answer is affirmative, you probably are a good seller of yourself and your products, and passions.
So, sell! sell! sell!  Which translates into "get what you want out of life!"
It is the name of the game, and not manipulative, if you realize we are all in this selling game together.
Some times we judge things not worthy of buying, and other times we hog what we love and buy it as quickly as we see it.
So, if you want to play the game of life right, you may consider brushing up on selling.
It's part courtesy, etiquette and manners, and part choice.  Dream big dreams and get the right things for you because you can, and should be happy.
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Daily Tip: Don't be a "Pin Prick." Remember you don't have to be bosum buddies with everyone, but you DO share the planet.

Don't let your prejudices blind you to the immense commonality you share with your fellow human beings.  Why?  We all share the same planet earth.  We all breath, eat and sleep.
Sadly, when people find out that you may hate football, soccer, eating fatty foods, or watching TV, they may think you are nuts!  Not only that, that may hurt your career advancement, and social prospects!
They may hurt you at work or cut you down in private.  They may make you feel stupid.
But why be a pariah to the world?
Because it is in the nature of humans to want to join in common likes and dislikes.
When people fail to share things in common, they often act immature and foolish, hurting and harming others through gossip, backstabbing, backbiting and cruel personal remarks.
How do we overcome these "pin pricks," and avoid becoming one?
Be kind to each other.  Do little things to help each other, and keep open-minded, and generous of spirit.
If you can overlook the obvious differences in attire, speech, tastes and attitudes of others, and look beneath the surface knowing that "the right thing to do is always right," you can make huge strides in being loved and popular.
You can look at superstars, and world leaders who practice diplomacy.
It works to warm people up with words of warmth.  Not cold, harsh, accusing stares.
What if you act nice, and people react to you with crap?
Don't give up.  Just keep on smiling and being very polite, doing your best, and being hopeful that your being a good person will eventually wear them down, or else get out of that lousy place if you are being discriminated against or feeling abused.  If that is not possible, you may want to talk to your immediate supervisor, and if that doesn't make any difference, then perhaps you need to find a place where people are like you.
Like attracts like.  You will find that as much as you want to bond with different folks, their natural tendancies will be to always congregate with people of like stripe.
Until next time, be kind to each other, love yourself, follow your own preferences, and if folks don't like you even though you are kind to them, don't lose heart.  Always keep believing, "You are great," and "you are loved."
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Daily Tip: There's a different law when you are on the road. Do not fail to yield and always drive defensively!

There have been so many tragic car accidents reported in the news today.  There have been many vehicular homicides from drunk drivers, sleepy drivers, lazy drivers and crazy drivers.
All so tragic.  What's worse is when you find out later on, that the charges against the "murdering driver-survivors," are minimal.  After posting some bail, many of these jerks are out of jail in no time.
What about the families of the innocent?  How are they to cope?  What about the innocent murdered victims?  One wonders, is justice really being served?
It seems there is a different law when you are out on the road.
When people murder others in domestic abuse, or premeditated murders or in assisinations there seems to be a lot more punishment handed out.
But when bad drivers kill innocent people on the highway, there hardly seems to be any repercussions.  Here is a true story that happened last Friday.

MANKATO — A Kasota man on a motorcycle died Friday after a collision with a semi on Mankato’s Third Avenue, according to the State Patrol.

Ray John Timp, 70, was driving north when he collided with a southbound semi making a left turn at Summit Avenue at about 1:20 p.m. Timp was wearing a helmet.
The semi was driven by 33-year-old Jeremie Lutteke of Wells.
The State Patrol report lists the accident as a “broadside” and does not indicate if a citation was issued.

Yet another totally innocent motorcycle rider killed by a criminally negligent truck driver. Look at the accident scene. Straight road, clear vision. The truck driver obviously intentionally ignored the cycle’s right of way, as these jerks so often do. He should wind up serving years in jail, and whoever he was working for should have their ass seriously sued.  But none of that will happen, as we apparently have different rules for people who kill on the highway.

So, if you are eager to travel the highways, and bi-ways, please buckle up, be a defensive driver, and watch out for others as well!

Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Monday, June 21, 2010

Daily Tip: Stay warmed in heart, mind and body. Walk.

I keep a walking blog.  It is a way for me to stay on track.
If you need a way to unwind, one simple, easy way is walking.
I listen to oldtime radio plays and my dogs walk with me,
I generally notice a marked improvement in my mood.
The walks act as a mood enhancer, and also a fat burner.
Walk every day, and stay warmed in heart, mind and body.

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Sunday, June 20, 2010

Daily tip: Just because you have found a love partner does not mean now you will be obese.

Queen, the band, sang, "Find me somebody to love."
Perhaps you had the good fortune of finding somebody to love.
Does this mean there goes your exercise program and now you will shop the fatso fashion line?
Well, what are you doing?
If you and your honey are busy dancing, eating lean protein and lots of fresh veggies, getting jiggy and staying active, you will be fine.
However, if Pizza is your pal and beer your bosom buddy you may be in for a shocker, and fat pants.
So, take your time, make up your mind.
You wanna stay sexy?
Keep on moving and grooving, even with your new life partner and you'll be great.
If you have ADD/ADHD remember those meds have slimming properties, so don't skip them either.
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Daily Tip: Our friend and foe is Time. Guard your time, since it is your life!

"For every minute spent in organizing, an hour is earned.”

Men talk of killing time, while time quietly kills them. ~Dion Boucicault

"Time is more valuable than money. You can get more money, but you cannot get more time.”

Time goes, you say? Ah no!
Alas, Time stays, we go. ~Henry Austin Dobson

Some things we own and do, rob us of our time.  Since they say, time is life, perhaps it is wise to prevent these time killers from swallowing up our life.
It pays to take time to think about the electronic devices, interruptions and distractions that keep us from enjoying our time here on earth.  There is the TV, a sendentary escape.  The computer, a mezmerizing offender.  The telephone, an alluring diversion. 
For me it's shopping and eating.
I know.  Everyone has their vices.  You can spend your life doing whatever you feel like.
It's your life.  However, think about your long-term goal.  How do you want to see yourself a few years from now?
Do you want to be a couch potato, and join the masses of the obese living a sedentary life?
Do you want to feel vital, alive and fit and full of vigor a few years from now?
It all depends on what you do with your time today!
Regardless of what we do, the sad fact is time marches on.
Let's think about the killer time, and it's minions, electronic and time-gobbling distractions.  Let's examine and decide how to manage ourselves with the things, or activities that rob us of what is so precious, and cannot be bought back with silver or gold, that is, our friend and foe, Time.
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Friday, June 18, 2010

Daily Tip: the superslim superstars know a key to trimness is an active lifestyle!

Do you need to trim down some?
Here is the solution I have found, from recent personal experience.
Although I am not a superslim superstar, I have tried to follow their formula for getting trim and maintaining the benefits I have reaped so far.
I've been trying to keep really busy by walkingeating salads, cleaning the house, writing poetry, creating my daily PicSay Comic, updating my fashion blog, being a radio DJteaching music and posting links on Twitter , catching up with others on face book and posting photos on Twitgoo.
Most of all, I've been trying to use my sound alarm clock (the roar of the seaside,) to go to sleep.  I have also been turning the TV off, and not drinking tea before bed so as to get a good night's sleep.
The results are, since 2 weeks ago, I have trimmed from a size 14 to a size 12!
To summarzie:
Stay active, get good sleep, exercise, and eat healthy. 
The result?  Feel better than ever!
Although, because of my ADHD, I still have a huge room for improvement with personal organization, network building, staying in touch with family and friends, being less anxious about junk, and trying to cut back on eating junk food, I think that getting proper sleep and exercise has been a big stress-reducer. 
Also, I've found keeping busy and eating more healthy foods helps me feel less sluggish.
Less TV-watching gets me off my butt, therefore reducing the fat-load on my bod because I used to always eat a lot in front of the telly.
Therefore, like all the superslim superstars know: Get busy and Get happy!
Amy Z

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Daily Tip: Sleep baby, sleep! with a good breathing technique

Relax before sleep?

How do you do that?

The topic of good sleep is a vast one, but today I will address one method of helping you relax to get to sleep, so that you will function better in every aspect of your life because you have more energy and got your proper sleep.
Some people advocate that listening to music is the key to their falling asleep.  For some that works.
However, many musicians will say it's hard to listen to the genre of music they generally play, to help get themselves to drift off to sleep, because they find they are analyzing the music and thinking, and that keeps them awake!
Well, musicians and others might try a different tact
The method that is prominent and beneficial is using your diaphragmatic muscles to relax in a method of breathing called Diaphramatic breathing.
Dancers, singers, athletes, dancers and yoga gurus are taught the importance of it, but maybe they don't practice it as much as they should anymore.
If you don't, here is a link to tell you more about it.
Follow the method outlined, and see if you sleep better.
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Daily Tip: Enjoy better living through Modern Conveniences! Today's M.C. (Modern Convenience) is The Dishwasher

One of the biggest stressors for someone like me with the ADHD disability is the inability and
unwillingness to clean the kitchen after cooking and eating.

All I can say is Thank Heaven! for the electric DISHWASHER!

I try, and I try to keep a clean kitchen sink, and try as I might, the dishes stack up. Day in and day out I used to stand helplessly by as I watched the dirty dishes pile up rapidly in my kitchen sinks and on the surrounding countertops.

How quickly the used and dirty dishes convened in crusty assemblage! It never ceased to amaze me at their ability to multiply and proliferate all over the house.

However, one little bright spot in the whole scheme of things is this.
I discovered how I should rely more often on my wonderful dishwasher.
I have begun to use it daily to prevent all the dirty dishes from going crazy and overflowing on my countertops, and filling up the sinks.

Now, after each meal is over, I make it my mission and ritual to soak those culprit dishes in warm soapy water and place them in the dishwasher.

When the dishwasher has finished washing the dirt off the dishes, and is sitting full of clean dishes, I remove the clean ones right away, or as soon as I can, so as to make room for the new DIRTY dishes.I have mantained this routine for 3 days so far.

I cleaned my counter tops magnificently last weekend, and now I am enjoying (for the first time in forever) the pleasure of simply clean countertops, and clean, empty kitchen sinks.
The dishes are either in their homes (the cubboards, and drawers) all clean and sparkly, or they are awaiting a good wash in the dishwasher.

Once again, thank goodness for the modern convenience of the dishwasher.

I never had one when I grew up. We 3 kids moaned and groaned and played checkers to see who would wind up having to help mum with the dishes.
My mum used to say, "I have 4 dishwashers (my mum, my sister, my brother and myself) and ONLY ONE WORKS!

Well, now I am in her shoes. Thankfully, along with the Yellow Dishwashing gloves, and dishwashing liquid, I have a real honest-to-goodness electric dishwasher that works!

But, I must too must work to do my part.  I need to work along side it to maintain it, cleaning it out periodically, and maintaining it in good functioning condition.
And I must make sure the dishes all get put away when they have finished being cleaned in dishwasher!
You may or may not suffer from ADD/ADHD,  but always remember, there are many modern conveniences out there to help make housework and chores easier, and although we may not all have the money for them, we can certainly try and use the conveniences we DO own to make our lives easier.
If we develop good habits, along with utilizing the modern conveniences that are available to us, we will make our lives a lot more relaxing and manageable as well.
Amy Zents
Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Daily Tip: Sometimes you need a few peanut M&M's before you must do the thing you think you cannot do.

"At some stages of your life you will deal with things and at others you are overwhelmed with misery and anxiety." ~ Nigella Lawson

There are days in the life of all people and not just those of us with ADD/ADHD when we feel overwhelmed with all the things we have to do.
It can stress one to the max.
Although I am not a big advocate of using food as a drug to relieve stress, I do think on occassion, in order to get the impetus to continue and the strength to move on, one could use a little pick-me-up.
Yesterday afternoon, during an intense housekeeping moment, I had such a taste treat in the form of a tiny bag of Peanut M&M's.
It was like a mini taste-vacation.
It helped me to carry on.
When the going gets tough, do yourself a favor, and find something that makes you feel a little less stressed.
It may be a refreshing drink of water, stepping outside for a breath of fresh air, a phone-call to a friend or maybe a taste treat that transports you for a brief time, and makes you smile with pleasure and delight before you must do the thing you think you cannot do.
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Monday, June 14, 2010

Daily Tip: Do what you have to do to make it through.

“Patience is the ability to idle your motor when you feel like stripping your gears.”~ Barbara Johnson

Most of life is work.  Sucky, yucky work.  If you have ADD/ADHD it can be dreadful to get up each morning and think about all the distasteful tasks there are to do.
Don't dwell on how awful it is to do them.
Make your daily list of mandatory tasks, and go about doing the good and not so good suff you have to do.
Then take a break and relax.
Focus on all the things you love and remember:
You did what you had to do, and you made it through.
You are a winner!
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Daily Tip: A vengeful person is always going to find themselves in a fight.

Be patient and understanding. Life is too short to be vengeful or malicious. ~ Phillips Brooks

There are some folks who always want to fight.  If you saw the movie "V for Vendetta" the lead character V, sought vengeance until he was killed in his fight for "justice."
He had just cause for wanting to murder all those who unjustly imprisoned and tortured him.  But, he was a vigilante and took the law in his own hands.  He conspired to kill everyone who hurt him, leading to his eliminating even the repentant Doctor, even after he listened to her apology and her side of the story.  She knew he would come to kill her, and he did.
Most of us would empathize with V.  He lost everything but his life.  His body was burned and disfigured from top to toe, and he always had to be masked.  You pitied V, but still he was a monster!
If we practiced vengeance in our everyday life for every petty grievance others have caused us, we would wind up in a constant struggle with those who push back.  We might even lose more than our good reputation.
No one likes it when others hurt them.  The tendancy is to strike back.  That is not always the wisest thing to do.  Arrogance and meanness can only attract more of the same.
Peace and mercy are hallmarks of humane behaviors.  We can be good to those who offend and try to hurt us by being patient and understanding. 
We can also stand up for ourselves, and seek a helping hand from those who love us.
Let us be hopeful that the pain and sadness others may cause us will eventually be avenged, not by us, but by life. 
While there may not be "Instant Karma," like we might wish there would be, there is the dictum, "You reap what you sow," and that old saw, "What goes around, comes around."
The facts are, if someone is mean and selfish, you learned a lesson. 
Keep away from them!  Also, it's up to you to protect yourself from those who would jerk you around, if you can, though this is not always easy.
If you have ADD/ADHD you are particulary vulnerable to attack, so put up your guard, thicken your skin, look for those who can protect you and inspire you to be careful in social and emotional situations. 
Watch what you say and don't trust everyone, especially if you suspect they are two-faced, or don't have your best interests at heart.
If you make a mistake, you can admit it.  If you are wrongly accused, DON'T ADMIT GUILT so that others can point at you and wrongly accuse you some more.  Instead, stand up for yourself.  Take the high road, and be wise, or talk to an advisor whom you trust.  Straighten matters out before they get worse.
Remember, we all hurt each other at one time or another, but if our intention is toward reconciliation there is hope.  If there is no forgiveness, there is no hope.
Be kind to each other.
Amy Zents
If we practice an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth, soon the whole world will be blind and toothless. -Mahatma Gandhi

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Saturday, June 12, 2010

Daily Tip: Love thy neighbour as oneself? Most people act as though they hate themselves thus zero love of their neighbour.

I was listening to Philip Marlowe private eye, on Old-time radio in an episode called the Good Neighbour Policy.  The people in an apartment flat were quite unacquainted with each other although they shared the same utilities.
How do you love your neighbour as yourself if you act as though you hate yourself and wish you could runaway from all the stressful people in your life?
Do you treat them in the same vile, wicked-tempered way you think of or treat yourself?
Do they deserve that?  Do you?
Some people utterly despise themselves and that self-disgust often makes them haters of others too.  (If the definition of hate is "to love less.")  They literally love their neighbour about as much as they love themselves which amounts to about zero love.
Especially if they have ADD/ADHD, and yet they are ashamed to admit their self-loathing and their buried resentment of others, even to themselves.  They often make nice in public, but truthfully wish they could runaway from everyone and everything that makes them feel put-down, frustrated and irritated.
As for treating others with contempt, well, there is secret blame, and when thinking of all the injustices it is easy to feel sorry for oneself.  Remember what I always say, "Self-pity is a downward spiral and the first step to failure."  Keep away from Self-Pity!  Avoid it like the plague that it is!
(I learned SELF-PITY is a big factor in most suicides.  Many call suicide, "the cowards way out.") 
You and I can be brave and face our challenges, yet try as we might to understand our troubles, it can be hard to give others their due respect or to even respect ourselves because of all of our personal misgivings, (the fact we can't find a pair of clean underwear!) and the mirror of our faults by those around us.  Others make us feel small, and we beat ourselves up on top of it.  A double-spanking!
There is no use for self-pity.
It's time to forgive, love and take care of yourself.  You may need to do this before you can even begin to love thy neighbour!
You CAN change.  You CAN get help!  You can make YOU happy.
I have to admit, I find it hard to take care of myself, much less those whom I love.
Therefore, I am trying a little more self-honesty in regards to my weaknesses (i.e. personal organization, holding my tongue, etc.)
Also, I will try and accept help from others, I will stand up for myself, and for my spouse, and in the long run for love of my neighbour.
The Internet has huge amounts of accurate information on improving one's perceived weaknesses that accompany ADD/ADHD, and you need to tap those resources, but first look at yourself in all honesty and truth and ask yourself, WHAT IS HOLDING ME BACK?
When you overcome your short-comings a little at a time you will learn to love yourself more, and then you will be able to love those around you better as well too.  And who knows, maybe they will love you back in ways you never thought of, such as, inviting you to parties, and becoming your real friend.
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Friday, June 11, 2010

Daily Tip: Imperfections are part of being a perfectionist, or Perfectionism is a double-edged dagger!

The pursuit of perfection, then, is the pursuit of sweetness and light. ~Matthew Arnold

Happy Friday friend!
One thing I have discovered in my ADHD journey to self-fulfillment and a semblance of sanity in this life is this:  I am a perfectionist.
Say what????
How can someone who loses her car keys, procrastinates prolifically, attracts clutter like hair on a moose, loses every pen, pencil and paper that comes her way be a perfectionist?
Easy.  I love perfection.
When I teach music, I want to be thorough.  When I work for an employer, I want to do right.  When I learn something, I want to learn everything about it.  When I am keen on an idea, a fashion, a place, a person, I want to soak it all in and revel in my newfound passion.  I hunger for excitement and novelty, bells and whistles, gadgets and gee-gaws, newness and sparkle!
I am the impulsive shopper, the wide-eyed kid in life's candy store, the sucker born ev'ry minute.
Which for many ADD/ADHD'er's is the addictive property of the disability.
How can one resist all the wonderful attractions that life has to offer?
Sadly, the downside of a voracious appetite for various interests is that I cannot process everything in an organized and timely fashion, so life becomes one big jumble of stimulations and distractions, plus lots and lots of neglected collections and piles of stuff.
Nevertheless, one of the hallmarks of procrastinators is perfectionism.  Another one, believe it or not, is humility.  Perfectionists want to excel to please their audiences!
Momma and society drove into us the gist of this song, "If you're gonna do it, do it right!" 
So, like most Weight Watcher attendees, procrastinators begin new projects and goals with high hopes, and when they meet with frustrating circumstances, they either throw in the towel, or they quit at the starting block.  How perfect is that?  Not very.
High standards and expectations often trip us up, and life can be so overwhelming!
In my opinion it is OK to be a "perfectionist."
Sometimes we score big because of it.  We get the dream job, the dream husband, la creme de la creme, and our big dreams actually come true because we dreamt them!
When we fail, we can comfort ourselves with the thought that at least our intentions were honorable.
The truth is, I love perfectionists. 
Yes, the perfectionist is someone special to me, as long as it is someone I admire and look up to for inspiration, and NOT for criticism, or a salary.
Working FOR a perfectionist is a whole different subject altogether.
I can't march to the beat of someone else's perfectionism.  Sorry.  That just doesn't work.
One is wise to be aware that perfectionism is enhanced when it is tempered with realism. 
It is wise at times for the perfectionist to let go a little at times with family members and friends, or else risk the alienation of others and wind up disgusted with oneself.
If you are a magnificent chef, artist, singer, dancer, photographer, doctor, teacher, programmer, or whatever occupation you find you excel in, there is no harm in aspiring to perfection, or being a perfectionist.  Bravo!  You are blessing the world with a service that is incomparable to the mediocrity most experience every day. 
So don't be half-hearted in whatever you are doing, and don't be down-hearted if you find perfectionism keeps you irritated and unsettled.  If you can avoid projecting your perfectionism on others they will love you for it.  None of us wants to be under the gun of a perfectionist.  Also, perhaps you might consider striving for the middle ground to stay sane and happy, and if you find perfection cripples you, try lowering your standards a little, doing your best to begin where you are, with what you've got right now so as not to be paralyzed by fear of failure.
Remember, you can't finish something you haven't started.
So, go ahead and dream big, be perfect, (or be imperfect, ) if necessary. 
Do whatever it takes to assist you towards what you aspire to accomplishing.
I hope you feel better about your search for excellence.
Perfectionism is a double-edged dagger!
Keep doing all you can to love yourself.
You are perfect when you know imperfections are a part of being a perfectionist!
Have a wonderful, and perfect weekend!
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Daily Tip: It's hard to enjoy chaos, but it's fun to procrastinate!

I think Smithers picked me because of my motivational skills. Everyone says they have to work a lot harder when I'm around. ~ Homer Simpson

If you have ADHD or ADD you have most likely discovered challenges in the “executive functions” of your brain - planning, organizing, and remembering, even though you may be very bright.
Perhaps you have found ways to cope.  That is fantastic.
For those still struggling, well, you may need to find out ways and means to deal with life's demands and your personal day-to-day responsibilities.  Most of all, you may need help with getting motivated!
No doubt, for me as well, being organized and efficient is a struggle.
If you like to plan for reasons of self-improvement or better organization (or just because planning is fun, and often a way to procrastinate!) you will find a huge amount of free templates online and lots of good information at this weblink!

Take your meds, get your proper sleep, and form good habits now to get at least the minimal done each day, and hopefully, by planning and doing (taking the baby steps you need for success) you will eventually find a balance in life that will help you to live a less chaotic existence.
Amy Zents
Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Daily Tip: Watch Your Step, and Snap Out of It for success!

“Pessimism is an excuse for not trying and a guarantee to a personal failure.”
 ~William Jefferson Clinton.

Today's post was going to be:
Daily Tip: Combat life's interruptions and distractions by disrupting negative or overwhelming obsessive thinking and avoiding substance abuse.
I know a long tip.  So, I shortened it.
Daily Tip:  Watch Your Step, and Snap Out of It for Success!

     I was listening to the Tennessee William's play, "The Glass Menagerie," this afternoon while on my daily walk.  The story was comic and tragic at the same time.  Talk about a bunch of losers with some serious issues!
     However, it was an insightful play about people living lives of quiet, and, well, not so quiet desperation!
     As ADHD'ers some of us tend to get stuck in negative thinking and pessimistic obssessive-compulsive pattens of behavior.
     We need to SNAP OUT OF IT!
     How to do that?  Well, a hint might be to disrupt the negativity when we sense we are sinking in that cesspool.  Laughter, love, comedy and refocusing on PRIORITIES with a major (Long-term) Goals list and minor (aka Short-term) Goals list that is posted prominently in a place where you can find it is good start.
     One suggestion is writing out your short-term (daily, tasks, aka goal steps) and long-term (big picture goals) on a DRY ERASE board on a wall where you can see it conveniently, then remembering to look at it often.  A reminder of your "steps," or daily task to-do's with a long-term view in mind, can help to realign the winning ADHD'er, (that means you!) with YOUR true north.
     Also, it is very important to avoid heavy drinking, and the abuse of all drugs, including finding ways and means to control the intake and obssession with that alluring oft OBESITY-INDUCING, much abused, yet necessary, substance called, FOOD.  
      Awareness of these dangers and distractions are a huge help to staying on track.
     I tend to see life and success as a series of steps.  The steps are usually going up and hard towards success, and the steps to failure are usually easy ones that will TAKE YOU DOWN.
     In Hollywood they love the TAKE 'EM DOWN tabloid stories.
     You don't want to be fodder for anyone's derision.  Neither do I, and I don't think the Enquirer or TMZ would be too interested in our problems either.
     So two things I am trying to focus on now, and I hope you will consider them as well.
     1)Watch your step, by double-checking what you need to do right now instead of worrying, and when you feel stuck on some negative pattern~
     2) Snap Out of it for success by noticing negative thoughts or harmful actions and refocusing on those priorities that are important to your success and happiness in both the short and long-term!
Amy Zents
PS.  Take time for fun! 
Check out my newest Jibjab.

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Daily Tip: Avoid the risk that is not fun, Melanoma.

On Monday I saw a half-naked man wearing jeans mowing hs lawn in the hot midday sun. He had no head gear on, no shirt and he was light-skinned. As I felt those screaming hot rays of the sun beat through my open truck window onto my arms and face I hoped in my heart that "Barechested Man" chose to lather his skinny bare chest, arms and back with sunscreen. I couldn't tell if he had any skin protection on, but I wouldn't bet on it.
I remembered how earlier in the day I set off the gas alarm after I sprayed my skin with bug spray AND sunscreen in my efforts to deliver the dogs to the park for their daily run in the sun, whilst protecting myself from the harm of UV's and West Nile.
How could a person like "Barechested Man" find information on skin care in the Springtime, in the middle of a heat wave, and very summerlike temps?
I think the proper education is always necessary for everyone, including "Barechested Man."  But, where to go for reliable truths on sun protection and skin care?
The Centers for Disease Control have a surplus of information on proper skin protection, and the prevention of skin cancer.
Here is where you can find some vital information:
Stay safe in the sun!
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Monday, June 7, 2010

Daily Tip: Keep your eyes wide open for the Jaysters in the road!

Today a young woman jaywalked in front of my truck as I was driving along the main state Highway 14 West with my two dogs, Cole and Pixie in the back of the truck..  This was a total "Jayster" who deserves a (PTC) Pedestrian Traffic Citation!  (I call them Jaysters, and not Jay birds.  Most Jay birds, of the avian variety, know better than to walk blindly in front of a truck.) Anyway this chick was  wearing "road" colors (bland, non-descript clothes) and she walked into my path. 
Also, it was rush hour and I was travelling in the direction of the late afternoon sun at 35 mph.  I barely saw this jaywalker up ahead and I was shocked to think I nearly ran her down, but I slowed down as fast as I could and my heart jumped, and the dogs and I lurched forward in surprise! 
You know what?  To be honest, I don't even think she was aware of my presence heading toward her in my 2 ton pick-up, nor did she notice me slow my truck down as we passed her clambering on to the median.   I wondered how she was so cool, and why she was so nuts?
She didn't seem to care about anyone but herself as she jaywalked in front of my pickup.
As I travelled the speed limit of 35 miles an hour, with the sun on my visor and everything, I didn't even notice her on the middle of the road, until I almost drove over her, and she didn't even glance up!
There is a median on Broadway St. (Highway 14W) and while I realized she was heading for it, I realized I was heading for her.  I would testify that I didn't even see her look both ways to make sure she could make it across. 
Was she tempting fate?  I don't know, but for myself, and my sketchy attention-span, that woman was very fortunate she did not get run-over by me.  I guess I am also fortunate I saw her, and slowed down.  Thank goodness the driver behind me kept a space cushion!
After my citation a couple of weeks ago, I have been very vigilant on the roads. 
I paid my fine today, and from here on out I NEED to maintain my driver's license and driving privileges by driving very carefully.   No more answering my cell phone without pulling over safely first.
I must do all I can to contine driving my vehicle.   I so desperately need wheels out in this area I live in that is, rural Minneosta.  I have been venturing to drive safely every moment I am on the road. 
What I DON'T NEED on my driving record is some butthead pedestrian making me guilty of involuntary womanslaughter!
Who do these jaysters think they are?  There is a cross walk at nearly every intersection.  Some even with lights.  I wish I could tell that idiot jaywalker these words:
"Go to the light stupid!  The red hand means STOPThe white-lighted man who looks like he is walking means you CAN walk.  The rest, means LOOK OUT!
Don't just walk in front of rush hour traffic anywhere you please if you value your life and the life of others.  Not everyone on the road is thinking about you!"
As for everyone else:
Please! please!  please! watch out on the roads for the jaysters and the idiots who walk in front of you in traffic.  Please don't jaywalk either.  No need to cause untold injury to yourself or others.
Plus, the animals won't be left wondering what's going on!
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Sunday, June 6, 2010

Daily Tip: Mind your "Hidden Brain." Take back controls.

Thanks to my friend Mary Peichel for alerting me to this interview.
You may like to hear this NPR interview.  The Hidden Brain,
Have a great week.
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Saturday, June 5, 2010

Daily Tip: You are ahead with a helmet!

My husband works as an ER doc.  Goes to work most nights on his Harley.  Always wears his helmet.
If you live in a place where there is a helmet law, you are most fortunate.  Here in Minnesota you don't have to wear a helmet.  But, you would be much safer if you did.  Statistics show that when a motorcycle is in a crash the likelihood of a head injury is greater than in a car.
Be safe always wear your helmet if you ride, or even if you are a passenger.
Biking, inline skating and ski-ing are also activities where a helmet can protect you.
You are ahead with a helmet!
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Friday, June 4, 2010

Daily Tip: Smiles are contagious, and so are frowns. Keep your head high, not facing the ground~Amy Zents

Frownlines seem to mar pretty foreheads because when others frown, our tendancy is to mirror their expression.
Poor posture is also a prevalant bad habit among most people who do not make a conscious effort to stand up straight and look confident and self-assured.
Your posture and your expression are linked to your overall mood and the image you project to others.
While some may want to clobber the perpetual Pollyanna, being cheerful is good for your mind and your body.
To exhibit poise and confidence practice sitting and standing straight.
Catch yourself if you feel a frown coming on.  You may be worried or sad, or heading in that direction.  Try and nip the bad mood in the bud, by relaxing your face, lightly rub your temples, breathe a sigh, and smile!
Try to avoid getting into the habit of frowning because others, including kids, pick up on your mood and soon they too are frowning.  Avoid Frownland.  We want Joyland, and sometimes Toyland, as well!!!
Also, if you want to make a ton of people happy, when they ask, "How are you?,"  Just say, "Pretty good, thanks!"  or "Great!" instead of "Everything sucks!"   Don't bring people down.  The mopefest, and the venting of the spleen should be reserved for those nearest and dearest to us, or saved for the diary.
Peace, and SMILE, Laugh and joke.  Here is a good joke for you.
"I set my Sleep Number bed to Windows 7. Now my bed has bugs and no support whatsoever."
Stand Tall, and Relax your face, and your mind!
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Daily Tip: Talking comes by nature, silence by wisdom.

A lot of people who are diagnosed with ADD/ADHD are extremely talkative.  In fact, sometimes words come flying out their mouths without any forethought put into the words, and then words not meant to be spoken are uttered. 
I know for a certainty my ADHD has caused me to say things which I have later regretted.
More often than not, it is concerning a topic I know best.  Myself.
So, I will disclose T.M.I (too much information,) about myself, and I will be the one at the disadvantage.
I used to monologue a lot.  The listener would open their eyes wide with horror, as I stumbled for words to describe everything in my life all in one visit.
Needless to say, it turned people off.
A conversation is not an interruption.
Was it me clamoring for attention, was the talkativeness nerves, or did I feel insecure and feel the need to prove something?  I don't know.
Nowadays, I try and avoid it.  Also, I try to avoid being with those people who make me feel I have to disclose everything to them. 
There are inquisitive types who are always trolling for juicy gossip.  I don't indulge them.
A large part of controlling my talking has to do with having a husband I truly respect and confide in.
I can confide in him first, and then edit what I want to tell others.
Also, knowing the ADHD is a factor in making me an impulsive talker is a help.
Even now, when my emotions get excited and I feel I have to tell everything, I remind myself, I DON'T HAVE TO TELL EVERYTHING!
I have been burned by people in the past by my talking too much.  Especially when going through a divorce, and when dealing with lawyers.
It seems some people feel when you tell them everything about you, they can take full advantage of you and your weaknesses, and they can use you for their own interests.  They can hurt you a lot as well, teasing you and telling other people your faults.  The sad fact is, they are hurting you with information you have so generously and freely given them! 
After all, they might think: "I paid the price for this.  I listened to your mindless chatter."
If you sense people don't want to listen to you, and arn't sincerely interested in you, walk away, YOU DON'T NEED THEM.
You are not a kid in grade school now, and you don't need to explain to Mommy or any authority-figure what you have been up to.
Your self-respect comes first.  Keep your dignity by knowing when to keep your mouth shut.
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Daily Tip: How to avoid self-sabotage? Don't tolerate Negative Self-talk, avoid ThE crAzY WeIgHts of the WOrld!.

“A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are.” ~ Anonymous

You were meant to win, not to lose.  Nevertheless, with ADD/ADHD you may have to overcome a few more hurdles to get that powerful WINNING mindset.
You have a problem and so do I.  It is with us everyday.  Now we KNOW it's there.  (Or we hopefully, got confirmation by a professional that it is there!)
So, watch it try and wreak havoc in your life, but don't let it get you down.
Who cares if you talk back at it, laugh at it, bust it in its tracks.
"Ha-hah!  Caught ya!" are some words you may direct to your ADD/ADHD
self-sabotaging thought and action patterns.
I hope you can follow along with what I am writing here.
If you are under professional care, I think you can.
There are behavioral and cognitive things you can do to avoid losing control of your emotions.
Slow down.  Breathe. 
Instead, find those people who assist you in being your very best.
Look for people in your life who can uplift you just by their very nature, or else by their training.
AVOID LIKE THE PLAGUE (which is very, very hard because they are everywhere!) the folks whon I call, "ThE crAzY WeIgHts of the WOrld!."
They use you freely for their own THERAPY.
They ask you for advice, then they shoot you down for being an idiot!
They belong to "the ain't it awful club."  Their "happy hour" is  really their MISERY hour.
Remember, because you are ADD/ADHD, you deserve and need encouragement...
Actually, most everyone: clients, customers, folks, think you are normal and can take all their B.S.
You may or may not be able to bear their burdens, but you DON'T HAVE TO.
You don't need MORE negativity in your life.
Now, affirm that you are somebody.
Somebody.  NOT A DOOR MAT!
Rule your own life, and choose your companions wisely so you can hang with the R.B.P. wherever you can find them in your world.
The R.B.P. are the
They may look normal on the outside, but if they are right for you, and they help you to like being you, valuing your unique gifts and talents while helping or inspiring you to make the most of your potential then:
And you are too.
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Daily Tip: Procrastination leads to late credit card fees. Pay right away!

"Sometimes it feels like I'm bathing in molasses..."  Those are the opening lyrics to my original song, entitled "A.D.D. Blues"
I mailed my Sony credit card payment check in 2 days before the due date, and I got a bill saying that I didn't pay my Sony Credit card bill on time and I was charged $39.00.   Why don't they just make it an even $40?
I thought I got the money in on time, but due to the snail mail the folks at Chase/Sony/Whatever processed it the day after it was due, hence the $39 charge!
Plus Interest!!!
So, I will cut up that card, needless to say.
I tried calling to straighten things out, but the Chase people said, "No go."
So, it's my loss as well as THEIRS!
The sad fact is, I had the funds to pay the bill, but I was very busy.  You know, just like you, I've got a life!
I didn't know I could just call them up and pay over the phone, and I couldn't find the correct website or my Sony card password, so I felt ripped off by yet another credit card company.
I didn't tell you my Target card horror story, where some hackers got into my account.
I was lucky Target notified me.  Nevertheless, guess who no longer uses her Target card either?
I think victims of ADD/ADHD have to be hypervigilant about the use of credit cards.
Be careful, it's a credit card/electronic JUNGLE out there!
When I got my citation last week from the cop, I was told the only way I could pay my traffic fine was on the telephone with a credit card!
Credit cards are a necessary evil in this society.  Necessary, yes, and yet, still very EVIL!
The lack of money is the ROOT of ALL EVIL! 
(A workmate I knew committed suicide due to money problems, addictions and ADD.  Needless to say having the credit card companies hounding him day and night did not help matters.)
Whoever had the "bright" idea of credit cards should be locked away.  Forcing all citizens to use credit cards is crazy, cruel and criminal IMHO.
ADD/ADHD victims are the ones who likely will pay most of the fines and fees to keep credit card companies happy, since the idea of cash..or good old-fashioned checks is now obsolete.
Amy Zents

Make sure to enjoy a sample of original music from my band Molly and Sonny Boy's newest CD release